Patience

He told me that He is trying to instill patience in me, yet I'm having such a hard time submitting to His plan and trusting that things will work out.

Let me back up a bit. Yesterday I was driving home and I starting a conversation with God. Out of no where I blurted out "I know I need patience!!!" and then, as if I was off actually talking with Jesus only to realize I was in my car, I shook my head and wondered where that came from.

Then He began to show me substantial moments in my recent life where He, in fact, made me wait. Did I realize it at the time? No way! Who does?

The 2 flashes He showed me were of our courtship/engagement/wedding and then of me joining the family business.

See, with the first flash, I had known since we started dating that S. was meant for me and that I would marry him. I began growing very impatient around our 2nd year of dating, thinking it was time to get married. By the 3rd year, even though I loved him more than anything, I was beginning to doubt the longevity of the relationship and really started putting on the pressure.

Little did I know that Jesus had the situation covered and that I needed to be patient.

On December 10, 2005, 3 years and 2 months after we started dating seriously, S. asked me to marry him in the most incredible way a woman could imagine and 10 months later we were married in the best wedding EVER.

Instead of working on my time, I should have submitted to Jesus and worked on His.

Second flash was me working with the family business.

Back in 2004-2005, S. and I wanted to work together as it just seemed easier. Yes, that was our reasoning. Looking back it seems obvious that it wouldn't have been the right move then, but we were young and I was incredibly...impatient. (Who would have guessed?) Time passed and I gained more experience in the marketing field, our relationship grew, we matured, even got married, and eventually the time came when it all fell into place - and worked!

It wasn't until the end of 2008 when I finally joined the family business and everything, for the most part, has worked out beautifully.

Jesus provides, as He told me, however I just need to be patient and trust Him.

And while I continually struggle with succumbing to His will and plan, almost always it seems like I'm fighting God, I feel more comfort knowing that He will provide for us, but on His time, and I just need to trust Him.

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2 Samuel 22:31:
31 As for God, His way is perfect;
The word of the LORD is proven;
He is a shield to all who trust in Him.

Jeremiah 17:7
7 Blessed is the man who trusts in the LORD,
And whose hope is the LORD.

Psalm 37:7
7 Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;
Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,
Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.

Hebrews 6:13-15
13 For when God made a promise to Abraham, because He could swear by no one greater, He swore by Himself, 14 saying, “Surely blessing I will bless you, and multiplying I will multiply you.”[d] 15 And so, after he had patiently endured, he obtained the promise.